Honoring Loss Moms on Mother’s Day: How to Show Love and Support
Mother’s Day can be a deeply painful time for mothers who have experienced stillbirth or the death of a baby in infancy. While the world celebrates with flowers and brunches, these moms are often carrying a quiet grief—one that doesn’t disappear just because their baby is no longer physically here.
These mothers are still mothers. They carried life, gave birth, held dreams for their child, and often held their baby in their arms. Their love did not end with loss. And on Mother’s Day, they deserve to be seen, remembered, and supported.
Here are a few ways to show love to a loss mom this Mother’s Day:
1. Say Their Baby’s Name
One of the most powerful and healing gestures you can offer is saying their baby’s name out loud. So many loss moms live with the fear that their child will be forgotten. Saying their name is a way to honor that their baby was here, loved, and still deeply missed.
Consider gently offering:
“I’m thinking of you and [baby’s name] today.”
“Happy Mother’s Day. I know how much you love and miss [baby’s name].”
“Your baby mattered, and I’m holding space for both of you today.”
Even if you’re not sure what to say beyond that, simply acknowledging their baby’s name is enough. It shows you remember. It shows you care.
2. Acknowledge Their Motherhood
Loss moms are mothers. Full stop. They carried, birthed, and loved their babies. They made space in their hearts and homes for a child who may not have stayed—but who will always be theirs.
You can support them by acknowledging that truth:
“You’re a beautiful mother.”
“I see your love and your strength.”
“You mothered [baby’s name] with so much care.”
Even if it’s been months or years, your words can offer deep comfort. Their identity as a mother doesn’t fade with time, and neither does the need for recognition.
3. Understand the Quiet Ache of Being Unseen
For many loss moms, Mother’s Day is a reminder not only of who is missing—but of how invisible that grief can feel. Watching other mothers celebrate with their living children can bring up a deep sense of sadness, envy, or even guilt. It can be a day where the world feels out of sync with their reality.
They may feel excluded from the joy or from the label of “mother” entirely—especially when people don’t know, or choose not to acknowledge, what they’ve gone through.
Simply saying, “I know this day might be really hard,” can be such a gift. Let them know you see their invisible motherhood and their brave, broken heart.
4. Honor the Complexity When There Are Living and Deceased Children
For mothers who have both living and deceased children, Mother’s Day can hold a strange and painful duality. They may receive handmade cards and hugs from one child while silently grieving another. Joy and sorrow often sit side-by-side on this day.
It’s important not to assume that having living children eases the pain of loss. In many ways, it can make the absence feel sharper.
Acknowledge both realities. You might say:
“I’m thinking of all your children today.”
“I know your heart is holding a lot—joy and grief—on this Mother’s Day.”
“You’re doing so much with such grace, loving both the seen and the unseen.”
Give space for all the emotions that might arise—gratitude, heartbreak, confusion, or even numbness. They are all valid.
5. Ask What They Need (and Listen)
Grief is not one-size-fits-all. Some loss moms want to be included in Mother’s Day celebrations; others might want solitude, or to mark the day in a private, intentional way. It’s okay not to know what to do—just ask.
You might say:
“How are you feeling about Mother’s Day coming up?”
“Would you like to do something in memory of [baby’s name]?”
“I want to support you in a way that feels right for you.”
Let them guide you. The most powerful thing you can offer is your presence and your willingness to listen.
6. Offer a Thoughtful Gesture
Small, heartfelt gestures can mean everything. Consider:
Sending a card that honors them as a mother.
Giving a candle, flower, or piece of jewelry in memory of their baby.
Donating to a relevant cause or nonprofit in their child’s name.
Writing their baby’s name in a journal or note and sharing that you remembered.
It's not about fixing anything. It's about witnessing their love and loss—and letting them know they are not alone.
To the Mothers Who Are Missing a Baby This Mother’s Day:
You are a mother. Your baby mattered. Your grief is sacred, and your love is endless. You are not forgotten. Neither is your child.
We honor you today—and every day.
If This Day Feels Heavy, You Don’t Have to Carry It Alone
Mother’s Day can stir up complex emotions—grief, anger, numbness, guilt, love, and everything in between. Whether you’re newly grieving or have been living with loss for years, it’s okay to need support. There’s no timeline for healing, and no wrong way to grieve.
If you're finding this time especially difficult, we’re here to help you hold space for your story, your pain, and your love.
Our therapists offer a safe, compassionate environment to process the heartbreak and trauma of stillbirth or infant loss. We’re here to honor your baby, your journey, and your motherhood—at your pace, in your way.
Reach out to us to schedule a therapy appointment. You deserve support, care, and a place where your grief is not only welcomed but held with tenderness.